Are you a woman who’s had a tangle with an Aquarius man and are now wondering if he’ll forgive you? There are some things that you may need to understand about him. Here is some information that could help you.
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Before we go further, let me tell you where this comes from. In my years as a relationship astrologer, I have sat with thousands of women who love an Aquarius man, and the question of whether he forgives comes up more than almost any other. In a survey of more than 2,600 women involved with Aquarius men, nearly 1 in 4 described their situation as “complicated,” and almost a quarter said the closeness they once felt had quietly started to fade. So if you are reading his silence and fearing the worst, you are far from alone, and what you feel is far more common than you think.
The good news is that an Aquarius man is rarely as unreachable as he seems in the cold moments. If you want the exact words that reopen the door with a fixed air sign who has gone quiet on you, my Aquarius Man Magic Phrases guide walks you through it message by message.
What You Did to Set Off Your Aquarius Man’s Silent Treatment
The first thing you always need to consider is what you may have done that either pissed him off or hurt his feelings. Typically you find out that you did something as he’ll start giving you the silent treatment.
Giving you the cold shoulder and barely talking to you is a signature move for Aquarius as a whole. Not just the men but the women also. The ice you out because how dare you to talk to them after what you did.
That’s literally what rolls through their mind if you’ve offended them in some way. However; if you aren’t sure what it is, try to retrace your steps and see if you can’t recognize something that stands out.
Aquarius isn’t quick fused but they aren’t as easily pushed over as Taurus. With Taurus; it takes a long time to tick them off unless the right button is pushed. With Aquarius, it tends to be things like offensive measures against their integrity.
This would mean you said something that was hurtful, demeaning to their character or perhaps indicated that you don’t trust their motives. Perhaps he’s talking to an ex-girlfriend as a friend but you’ve decided to ask him if it’s more.
He will quickly assume you don’t trust him and that in itself is damaging. When an Aquarius man commits to you; he is loyal. He assumes you should know this and so when you question him; he gets angry.
So again, his degree of being upset or angry is going to depend on what it was that occurred. If it was something that wasn’t that big of a deal, he’ll likely get over it and move on quickly.
How Long Will an Aquarius Man Stay Mad Before He Comes Around?
This is the question that keeps you up at night, so let me answer it honestly. For a small slight, an Aquarius man usually cools off within a few days. His ruling planet, Uranus, makes him quick to detach but also quick to reset once the emotional charge has passed. He cares far more about his own peace of mind than about punishing you, so once he has thought it through, he tends to return as if very little happened.
A deeper wound is different. If you bruised his sense of integrity or made him feel he could not trust you, his silence can stretch from a week into several, and he will not be rushed. In my survey work, more than a third of women said their Aquarius relationship was not progressing at all, and the reason is almost always the same. He simply does not move at anyone else’s pace, and that includes the pace of making up.
If his quiet has already turned into full radio silence, you may find it helpful to read my guide on what to do when an Aquarius man is ignoring you before you make your next move.
If It Was Just a Heat-of-the-Moment Slip, Here Is How Quickly He Lets It Go
If you two didn’t see eye to eye for a moment or you said something didn’t mean in the throes of a passionate argument, he may decide that it wasn’t meant as malice.
In the case of something slipping in the heat of the moment, he will likely forgive and forget. However; if it was something he perceives as a big deal or deal-breaker, then you have something harder to deal with.
You’ll typically be able to tell how angry or upset he is by his actions. How long does he stay silent? Has he completely left you over this issue? Is he still around but just not talking?
The only thing that you can really do is apologize and give him some time. He needs to calm himself down and sort things out in his own mind. Once he does, he’ll come back around.
Unless something really unforgivable occurred, he should come around reasonably quickly. Aquarius typically only stays mad or holds grudges if you’ve done something really horrible to them or someone they love.
They love their family so you may want to watch out what you say about them in your times of anger. They can forgive sleights you make against them but not against their family.
Take my free quiz here and find out what his heart is really telling you.
5 Quiet Signs Your Aquarius Man Has Actually Forgiven You
An Aquarius man rarely announces that he has let something go. He shows it in small, easy-to-miss ways, so here is what to watch for.
First, he starts answering your messages at his normal speed again instead of leaving you on read for hours. Second, his tone warms back up, and the short, clipped replies give way to the curious, chatty version of him you fell for. Third, he brings up a future plan, even a casual one, because an Aquarius man does not invest his imagination in someone he has written off.
Fourth, he teases you again. Playful, slightly detached humor is his love language, and when it returns, the wall is down. Fifth, he stops referencing the thing that upset him. Remember that this sign forgives long before he forgets, so the day he no longer drags the old argument into a new conversation is the day you know it is genuinely behind him.
The Difference Between What an Aquarius Man Forgives and What He Never Forgets
Most Aquarius men do not hold big grudges. That is more of a trait for Taurus and Aries. Aquarius is willing to forgive but forgetting is another matter. He may hold onto some things and use them in a later fight.
In fact; they store it in their files in their mind. If you tick them off again enough at another time; they’ll dust that out and throw it at you. You’ll think that the problem was already solved yet here it is again.
Aquarius has a tendency to harp on things too which is caused by the “unforgetting” portion of the equation. That part is what you may have troubles getting him to let go of.
Doing small things and giving you the silent treatment is not going to be things he holds against you forever. He is good at getting over it and moving forward.
If it’s something that caused a ripple for some time, he’ll take inventory and put it in storage for another time. As in the next time, you mess up; that dirt comes back out into the bowl in front of you.
There is also the case of perhaps you did something that betrayed his trust. If that’s the case then it may be a deal-breaker. If you lied to him or cheated on him; that’s game over for him. He likely will not forgive you for this.
Will an Aquarius Man Ever Forgive Cheating or a Broken Trust?
This is the hardest truth in the whole conversation, so I will not soften it. An Aquarius man can forgive almost anything said in anger, but a betrayal of trust sits in a separate category for him. Lying to him, going behind his back, or cheating strikes at the one thing he values most, which is the freedom to believe what you tell him without checking it.
When that trust breaks, his response is not rage. It is distance. He withdraws into his own head, weighs the evidence the way he weighs everything, and quietly decides whether you are someone he can ever feel safe with again. Some Aquarius men do find their way back, especially when the relationship ran deep and the betrayal was a one-time lapse rather than a pattern. Many simply close the door and never reopen it.
If you are in this position, do not bombard him with explanations. Give him a calm, honest apology, then give him room. Pressure reads as manipulation to him, and manipulation is the surest way to confirm his worst fear about you.
Warning: The One Move That Guarantees an Aquarius Man Won’t Forgive You
If there is a single mistake I beg the women I work with to avoid, it is this. Do not chase him while he is processing. The moment you flood an Aquarius man with calls, double texts, and demands to just talk, you turn a solvable problem into a deal-breaker.
Here is why it hurts you so badly with this particular sign. An Aquarius man needs space to regulate his own feelings, and when you crowd him, he does not experience it as love. He experiences it as a threat to his autonomy, which is sacred to him. Cornering him to force a resolution tells him that being with you means losing his freedom, and that is the one trade he will never make.
So as painful as it is, the strongest thing you can do is step back and let him miss the silence you are giving him.
The Smartest Move to Make After You Have Upset Your Aquarius Man
If you look back and are able to narrow down what may have happened, you may want to apologize quickly and then let him have time alone to sort things out. If it’s no biggie, he’ll get over it.
If it was a doozy and he’s in a tailspin, he may require more time alone and the best option for you is to understand enough to let him have it. Don’t keep texting him and calling him. He needs silence from your end to sort his head out.
There is also that possibility that he’s being icy because something else happened that had absolutely nothing to do with you but he isn’t ready to disclose information yet. He needs to cool his jets.
If he comes home and is in a foul mood; try not to assume the worst. Be loving but also let him have space. He’ll appreciate you giving him time to cool off and figure out if it’s something he wants to discuss or not.
Especially if you’re in a committed relationship with him; let him come to you when he feels ready and calm enough to do so. Otherwise, you’ll seem as though you’re trying to push him and that will not go well.
So before you fly off the handle and assume the worst; take inventory and make sure it’s not you. Let him calm down. If it is you, look at what happened and you should be able to asses if it’s something small or something big enough to thwart any forgiveness.
Why an Aquarius Man Forgives You Faster When You Do Less
It feels completely backward, I know. Every instinct is telling you to fix this, to explain, to keep reaching out until he understands. But with an Aquarius man, effort and pressure are not the same thing, and he cannot tell the difference when you are in his inbox every hour.
An Aquarius man reaches his own conclusions in his own time. When you go quiet and steady, you give his independent mind the one thing it craves, which is room to arrive at forgiveness as if it were his own idea. The less you push, the faster he softens, because he is no longer defending his space and can finally feel what he actually misses about you.
Doing less does not mean doing nothing. It means one sincere apology, and then trusting him enough to let him come back on his own.
How to Apologize to an Aquarius Man So He Truly Hears You
A good apology to an Aquarius man looks nothing like a good apology to most other men. He does not want a tearful, dramatic scene, and he does not want to be talked at for an hour. What reaches him is something calm, honest, and brief.
Lead with what you understand rather than how sorry you feel. Tell him you see why your words or actions landed the way they did, because an Aquarius man respects insight far more than emotion. Keep it short and specific, name the actual thing you did, and resist the urge to pile on excuses or to turn it back on him.
Then, and this is the part most women skip, end it cleanly and step away. Do not wait there for him to respond or reassure you. Offering him a thoughtful apology and then the freedom to think about it is the most attractive, trust-rebuilding thing you can do with this sign. A text is often better than a phone call, because it lets him absorb your words without feeling put on the spot.
The Secret Reason an Aquarius Man Can Forgive You and Still Pull Away
Here is something almost no one warns you about. An Aquarius man can genuinely forgive you and still decide to step back, and to him the two are not a contradiction. Forgiveness, for him, is about releasing the resentment. It is not a promise to return to exactly how things were.
Sometimes a conflict simply shows him something he had been quietly wondering about, and he uses the cooling-off period to reassess the whole connection. This is the withdrawal pattern so many women describe, where the closeness fades after a fight even though he insists everything is fine. If that is what you are facing, the work is no longer about the apology. It is about gently rebuilding the easy, pressure-free closeness that made him feel free with you in the first place. My guide on how to get an Aquarius man back walks through exactly how to do that.
If you want the specific phrases that melt his guard and remind him why he let you in, my Aquarius Man Magic Phrases were written for this exact moment.
Aquarius Man Forgiveness: The Questions Women Ask Me Most
Does an Aquarius man forgive, or does he just quietly move on?
It can be both, and that is exactly what makes him so confusing. An Aquarius man is genuinely capable of forgiving you, releasing the anger and moving forward without holding it over your head. But because he is an air sign who protects his independence, he is also capable of forgiving you in his heart while still drifting away in practice.
The difference usually comes down to how the conflict made him feel about his freedom. If he still feels free and respected with you, forgiveness brings him back. If the conflict left him feeling controlled or smothered, he may forgive you and still choose distance.
Watch his actions over his words. An Aquarius man who is reaching out, teasing you, and making plans has forgiven you and stayed. One who is polite but absent has forgiven you and gone.
Do Aquarius men hold grudges for a long time?
Most Aquarius men do not hold grudges the way a Taurus or a Scorpio might. They are not interested in carrying resentment around, because it weighs down the very freedom they value. For everyday slights, he lets go relatively quickly once he has had time alone to process.
The catch is his famous memory. An Aquarius man forgives but rarely forgets, and he quietly files away what happened. If a similar problem comes up later, do not be surprised when he calmly references the old one. That is less a grudge and more pattern recognition.
The real exception is a betrayal of trust. There, an Aquarius man can hold his position indefinitely, not out of spite, but because he has logically concluded that the risk is not worth taking again.
Will an Aquarius man come back after he has been hurt?
Very often, yes, especially if you give him the space to want to. An Aquarius man rarely responds well to being pursued while he is hurt, but he responds beautifully to being missed. When you stay calm and stop chasing, you give his curiosity room to pull him back toward you.
How long it takes depends entirely on the depth of the wound. A small misunderstanding might resolve in days. A serious breach of trust can take weeks, or may not resolve at all.
What you can control is the environment you create. A warm, low-pressure, drama-free door is the kind an Aquarius man walks back through. A door with demands attached is one he avoids.
What should you never do when an Aquarius man is angry?
Never corner him. The fastest way to lose an Aquarius man for good is to chase him down, demand immediate answers, and refuse to let him retreat. To you it feels like fighting for the relationship. To him it feels like an attack on his autonomy.
Also avoid trying to make him jealous or guilty as a tactic. An Aquarius man sees through manipulation almost instantly, and once he catches it, he trusts you less than he did before the argument even started.
Give him space, offer one honest apology, and then let the silence do its work. Quiet restraint is far more powerful with this sign than any grand gesture.
How do you apologize to an Aquarius man over text?
Keep it short, calm, and specific. Name the thing you did, show him you understand why it bothered him, and skip the long emotional paragraphs. An Aquarius man reads sincerity in clarity, not in volume.
Resist the urge to send three follow-up texts if he does not reply right away. One clean message that does not demand an instant answer respects his need to think, and that respect is part of the apology itself.
Then step back and let him process. A text gives him the room a phone call does not, which is exactly why it tends to work better with him.
Are Aquarius men forgiving? Let me know!
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Wishing you all the luck of the universe
Your friend and Relationship Astrologer,
Anna Kovach
OMG?This sooo “my Aquarius Man”! The love of my life & I are just coming out of a 40+ day separation due to a misunderstanding in the heat if the moment ??? ok Yes I admit I said something to hurt him & although I meant what I said perhaps I cld have (& obviously shld have) choosen my words more carefully! Anyway although we noth admit that the “love” is still there & that we both want to work it out & be together…he is still feeding me at a distance so to speak! I just want US back & better bc I’m so in love with this man! HELP ME PLS ???
My aquarious man is convinced that I am sexually involved with a friend of mine that is a guy. I do not have a car and I have a male friend that is often available to give me rides where I need to go. I have always been honest with him about that so he would trust me and know there was nothing but friendship between us. As time went by he started questioning me and wanting to know if I was being totally honest. I admitted to him that we had gone to eat during one of the times he had given me a ride. From that point on he assumed I had never been truthful and that I had always been dishonest. As time went by I felt him emotionally withdrawalling from me. A week later he stopped talking to me all together. No matter what I did there was no way of talking to him. After 4 months of no communication I called to see if he had the same number. He answered and 2 days later we started seeing each other again. But being with him now just hurts more. He is so distant and although he does talk to me I feel like I’m with a stranger. At this point I don’t know that he’s able to make any emotional connection with me again.
Hi Cynthia!
This honestly sounds like his own issue honey. If he cannot trust you then that is on him. There is no reason for him not to unless he’s been badly hurt by someone in the past. He needs to work on his own inner healing so he can learn to trust again otherwise he’s not going to change. Not all Aquarius men are like this sweetheart. If you would like to know more about Aquarius man, check out my book “Aquarius Man Secrets”.
Hi Ava!
It seems some trust needs to be built. He wants to know that you’re not going to get to that level again and say something that he feels is harsh. He doesn’t want a lifetime partner that will always talk to him like that. He is being cautious. Give it a bit of time and patience and you may find that you get back together in a loving fashion. If you would like to know more about Aquarius man, check out my book “Aquarius Man Secrets”.
Ok so this isn’t good but I need advice. I’ve know this 29 year old mate for 12 years cause I worked with him.
I’ve been with my current partner for 7 years and have two kids with him. 4 years ago we have a row and he refused to leave so I had him removed by the police because I felt intimidated. He went out that night and called me and said he loved me and we both said sorry and he said he was coming home, instead he chose to go bk to a girls house and sleep with her. Cut a long story short, for 3 years of hurt & pain he stil wasn’t trying to make it up instead he was nasty, rude and secretive. He split with me and we didn’t speak for 2 weeks but we was living in the same house. I got attention from the man who I worked with (Aquarius man). We met for weeks just for coffee then we decided to go easy for a night. My ex was at work and my friend had my kids. When I got bk my ex was still being nasty so I told him I slept with someone else the night before. Before all this came out he admitted to me that more had gone on with the fork
He slept with. He didn’t use anything and he slept with me for a week before he told me. I told him the day after but in a nasty way then a year later told him who it was.
I got the cold shoulder off the Aquarius man and he got back with his gf. He owns a local shop and my partner was going there daily and I felt guilty so I told him who he was and then he went to see him and I had to tell his gf before my ex did. I really really like the Aquarius man and can’t get him out of my head. I’m back with my ex and he’s back with his. He won’t speak to me he won’t respond to me at all.
I assume this is unfixable and I’ve really screwed up?
Hi Charlie!
There is more to whether or not you screwed up honey. They have made their own decisions… both men. The Aquarius guy has seemingly moved on and with someone else and so unless they break up, there isn’t much you can do. Try to stay friends with him maybe and if they break it off you can suggest giving it another shot. That’s about all you can really do. If you would like to know more about Aquarius man, check out my book “Aquarius Man Secrets”.
Your story is extremely confusing
Hi Sharon!
I’m sorry you find my story complex and hard to understand. Perhaps you should try reading my books as they have far more information and may help you with whatever you have going on with your Aquarius man situation. I would love to help you! If you would like to know more about Aquarius man, check out my book “Aquarius Man Secrets”.
I’ve recently started talking to this incredibly sexy dark and mysterious type Aquarius and hr started out our knowing eachother and flirting by saying it might not work our because he lives in Sweden and I’m in the us, plus he’s in a traditional catholic family and I’m not catholic, plus I’m not native to their culture. As his family is incredibly important to him, he knows that they won’t like me because I don’t speak the language or know the culture of Sweden. This became an issue when he brought it up today and, being a Pisces, I threw an emotional tantrum. We communicate largely on Snapchat, (which I do not like but he insisted on it) so I’m not really sure if that affects our relationship at all, but he’s wonderfully sexy and has the exact same life goals and servant’s heart that i do . . . He is utterly perfect in every way that I’ve experienced so far. I messaged him about 40 minutes ago and I’m not going to message again until he gets back to me, but I’m really anxious to talk to him again and I just needed to get all if this out there because my best friend (grandmother) passed away this past Sunday and I’m an emotional wreck. Anyone have any tips ?
Hi Aly!
Talk to him like he’s your best friend honey. Tell him what has happened. He should be understanding and consoling for you. If he isn’t then he’s possibly not into it as much as you are. Yes you two have some big differences but they are things that can be compromised on with time and patience. You two must have it. Be honest with him! If you would like to know more about Aquarius man, check out my book “Aquarius Man Secrets”.
I have been in a relationship with an Aquarius man we are in love with each other like hell . In last approx. 6-7 months are getting apart from each other its like we just friends for each other . when i had been in this situation after getting into some distractions i had sex with another boy for 3 times . That was my biggest and the worst mistake of my life . I don’t know how could I’ve even done this but it now I can’t change my past . I love my man very very very badly I know i have done the worst thing to him but now i want to make an apology that he could forgive me for what i did . Now he don’t even want to talk to me and he asked me to leave him forever please i need your help i want him back i want to win his trust again i want his love again please for god sake help me to get out of this trouble and tell me what should i do now to get back my boyfriend’s trust and love . How can i get back to him in my life ?
Hey Rahat, I am in a similar situation. Before me and my aquarium man we’re officially dating, I slept with someone else. We dated for a few months but he couldn’t get over what I did. I feel exactly how you do too. I cut off contact with him, he texted me a week later asking me to get my stuff but then invited me to hang out with his best friend. We haven’t gotten back together or anything but at least he does reach out to me here and there. My best advice is let him come to you, if he doesn’t, moving in might be the best option. He may come back when you least expect it. Don’t contact him first, I did that before I decided to let’s e him alone and it only stirred up more drama. He needs time to calm down.
Hi Dee!
I agree with your solution. I think you know exactly the right thing to do here. That’s pretty much what I advice. It takes time to calm down and settle his mind. Giving him space and being patient then being friends again is the best method. If you would like to know more about Aquarius man, check out my book “Aquarius Man Secrets”.
Hi Rahat!
Betrayal is a very difficult thing for anyone to recover from which is exactly what he feels. He feels you betrayed him and he’s very hurt. He may not ever be able to forgive or forget. He’s one that can cut someone totally out of his life. I’m afraid other than apologizing to him and giving him time to calm down, there isn’t a whole lot more you can do. If you would like to know more about Aquarius man, check out my book “Aquarius Man Secrets”.
I have been seeing this Aquarius man for 3 years. I have been seeing signs of another woman which he constantly denied. I eventually saw female underwear in his bedroom which I destroyed. We have not talked for days. Do you think he will forgive me for destroying the garment?
Hi Marco!
If you are seeing signs of another women, your intuition is probably screaming at you to let him go. I don’t think you should be asking for forgiveness finding another woman’s garment in his bedroom. He should be the one apologizing to you. If you feel you are in the wrong then that’s part of the problem. Hold him accountable for his actions sweetheart! If you would like to know more about Aquarius man, check out my book “Aquarius Man Secrets”.
Hey Aquarius man lovers!
I have many of your wonderful writings Anna and love them all.
My question is ‘Should I stay for the long game or (finally) move on now?
I am a Taurean with Moon sign Aquarius so I’ve never had to work hard on gaining his interest. Quite the opposite in fact. I seem to just be able to think ‘what would I want now’ and instinctively it works. Long story short we’ve broken up 4 times – yes I heard there was an ex on the scene-complicated and messy and neither of us handled it well (4 times ?) but Anna’s advice was always spot on to recreate our togetherness.
The last time I left I was just ‘done’ with his lack of openness and honesty. That was 7 months ago but 3 months in again he was texting; we’d meet for coffee; went out for dinner and omg he even sent me a naughty video of himself! We’ve been dancing around the ‘go with the flow’ for months now with no physical apart from long hugs and so I sent him an email the other day being open about how I feel after all my inner work. I didn’t ask for anything-just wanted to say that I didn’t want another man to get what I felt he deserved after instigating me making me a better person. I feel he deserves the love I only want to give him and that I’d like to repair the relationship rather than just friends.
He said ‘I don’t love you anymore-not like I did, although I love you dearly and want so much to be friends’.
I said ‘I’m happy you don’t love me as you did as it was unhealthy and draining’ I said I am unlikely to want to stay friends but would like to still give you your present. We are having dinner tomorrow.
He still messages during the day.
Is there hope of reparation and should I stay friends in the hope we come back to each other? I’ve heard that if they are done they are very blunt. However I’ve also heard they test!!
My gut says he’s lying as he’s hurt I left 4 times and that I want to also test him by saying ‘tough I’m standing by you like it or not’ so he can see I now know how to show up for him.
What do you think? Thank you for any advice ?
Hi Sharon!
Thank you for the beautiful feedback. I appreciate it and very happy to know you’re working hard on your inner self. That’s wonderful! Now with the Aquarius man… If you test him by saying you’re going to stand by him whether he likes it or not may actually scare him in the wrong direction. That sounds kind of like a stalker… try it on one of your friends and see what they say. I think what you need to do is pull back and not contact him for awhile. Maybe what he needs is to miss you and in doing so, he’ll learn that he really wants to be with you. It may not work if he really doesn’t want more but it’s a risk worth taking. If he doesn’t reach out or come back around then it solidifies he meant what he said. If or when he does message you, don’t answer him right away. Let him wait. If he does love you and wants you back he will do anything! I hope this helps darling. I wish you all the very best!