How To Get An Aquarius Man To Open Up Emotionally (6 Ways)

by Anna Kovach, relationship astrologer
How to get your mysterious Aquarius man to open up and share his feelings with you? I'll help you get into his head and encourage him to communicate

It’s never easy to get an Aquarius man to open up emotionally. Internally, he’s struggling with the feelings he has. So, it’s understandable that he will take his time letting someone into his life.

An Aquarius man does not choose any random person that he thinks is worthy enough. He considers it carefully and wisely. Making the right decision is crucial for him, as he doesn’t want to risk getting hurt. 

If you want to get an Aquarius man to talk about his feelings, you need to understand how his mind and heart work. If you ask yourself, ‘Is my Aquarius man opening up to me?” the answer is not going to be obvious.

It’s confusing and can even be heartbreaking because you expect his feelings for you to be his biggest priority. But they’re not, at least not in the way you’re expecting.

But here’s how to get an Aquarius man to open up: though it may be difficult, you can help make the whole process easier for him.

Are Aquarius Afraid Of Emotions?

Aquarius men are tough nuts to crack. As an air signs, they are rational and objective, detached, aloof and cool. As men, they’re even more rational and analytical.

An Aquarius man running from emotions is a common scenario. It is not rare; it is even expected in the first stages of dating. To him, the heart is a deep and murky ocean, a confusing and dangerous place.

He knows that a buried treasure is somewhere in the depths of that ocean as well, but he’s going to take his time immersing himself in search of it. Don’t expect a deep-sea diver at first. He’ll want to keep his head above water.

His mind is a battery, and he needs to keep it active. But all this focus on progressive, futuristic ideology keeps him from feeling with his heart, so yes, you could say that an Aquarius man is scared of feelings.

Here’s more about Aquarius men negative personality traits and how to handle them <<

How To Get An Aquarius Man To Open Up — 6 Ways To Get An Aquarius Man To Talk About His Feelings

1. Treat Him Like Your Best Friend

The most important value to an Aquarius man is friendship. You may have noticed how much time he spends with his mates – girls and guys – and how special they are to him. 

If you really want to be close to him, you need to be his friend first, and his girlfriend second. You need to treat your time together as if you were hanging out with your buddy, playing around and having fun. 

Once you have built some kind of friendship with him, then it’s much, much easier to get him to stop hiding and show his true feelings. It may be an abrupt sentence in the middle of a Netflix binge, or after a great time out. 

In other words, being easy-going and acting like his bestie is really the magic touch that makes him trust you enough to share what’s on his heart!

>> Are Aquarius Men Jealous? Find Out Here

2. Have An Open Conversation

If you really want him to share his true feelings, then cultivate the art of conversation with him. Build a powerful, strong mental connection together that can help you to get closer and more intimate. 

More often than not, his love language is verbal affirmation. His words say it all, even if his feelings don’t. Trust him when he tells you that he cares about you. Just because he’s not lavishing affection on you, or telling you his deepest emotions, doesn’t mean that he doesn’t care! 

You could start one day (in a casual way), asking him how he feels about work, for example, or a certain person. How his childhood was. Who his first girlfriend was. Work your way up to a more intimate conversation, slowly.

Related: Questions To Ask An Aquarius Man To Spark His Interest

3. Have A Few Drinks Together

The truth is, some Aquarius men simply need to have a few drinks to loosen them up emotionally. In fact, most do. It’s the only time where they’ll not care enough to be vulnerable with you – because they know they will probably not remember it. 

So, if you really want him to stop hiding his true feelings for you, book a restaurant to go to and have a bottle of wine together. Go to a sports match and have some beers! Go out to a concert and have some tequila! It’s amazing what alcohol can do to an Aquarius in terms of opening up. 

Do this a few times, and you may learn more and more about what makes him tick, and he can also start learning more about getting comfortable with you. 

4. Get Physically Intimate

Have you ever heard of pillow talk? Those conversations that happen after intimacy, when you’re lying next to each other, totally open and exhilarated? 

Often, this is the best way to get close – when you’ve just been physically close. There’s a reason why women back in the day used to ask their husbands favors after a good romp in the sheets! They knew he’d be softer, more open and more willing to listen and open up. 

Getting him to talk and share in those few precious moments may be the exact opening you need to help him start doing that outside of the bedroom, too! 

5. Do Astrology Together

Aquarius is interested in Astrology! Even your Aquarius man, who is such a scientist, will likely want to know more about it. 

You could slowly show him an article or two that you know describes him (avoid horoscopes for now as that will be too much for him) and gradually bring it up every now and then. 

The more you talk about it, the more likely he’ll be to engage, and he may even get rather excited about Astrology when there’s something that really speaks to him. This is when he may open up something about himself and his true feelings!

6. Don’t Expect Too Much

The truth is, ladies, in my experience as a Relationship Astrologer, you really can’t expect too much from your Aquarius fella in terms of feelings. He’s just not that guy, and if you try and change who he is, all you’re going to be met with is disappointment. 

These methods above may work in some small ways, but you really are going to need a lot of time before you “figure him out.” He is a mass of contradictions and is always changing, so one day he may be rather sweet and verbal, and the next, he could be closed off.

If you flow with his unpredictable side, you’ll learn to pick by the signs of him being open with you. If you don’t expect too much, you will only be pleasantly gifted with what he does give you, when he does open up!

If an Aquarius man ignores you does that mean he is testing you? << find out here

Do Aquarius Open Up Easily?

One of the biggest complaints I hear from women about their Aquarius men is that, while he isn’t afraid of talking, he doesn’t truly open up. He may go on about a million different subjects, but he doesn’t get deeper into his feelings.

There’s a reason for this. He doesn’t know how…

Even if he’s a neurosurgeon or mechanical engineer, the fact that an Aquarius man can perform all kinds of impressive mental gymnastics doesn’t translate into emotional literacy. He doesn’t talk about how he feels because he doesn’t know how to feel safe articulating his feelings.

Geeking out in the academic, trivia, and tech worlds is his comfort zone, while being vulnerable in the emotional world is not.

But like any language, emotional recognition and expression can be taught. This is where your patience and understanding become vital.

Rather than expecting him to speak your language right away, you’ve got to learn to understand his language. Click here and discover how to speak your Aquarius man’s love language <<

How To Emotionally Connect With An Aquarius Man

If you want to emotionally connect with an Aquarius man, pay attention to the various ways he will express his feelings to you. When it comes to his hobbies and interests, expect him to try to connect with you on an intellectual level.

Your role in a relationship with an Aquarius man can be to help him connect with his feelings. So, whatever you do, don’t pile all your deepest feelings onto him at once in an attempt to ‘teach’ him to be more expressive. This will put him on overload, and he’ll shut down.

Instead, take note of the words he uses. You may notice that he avoids placing himself directly in the conversation but describes things like outside scenes he is observing.

The more you can be patient and demonstrate that he can take risks in talking about how he feels and how things affect him, the sooner he will start to open up.

How To Cheer Up An Aquarius Man When He Is Depressed?

Aquarius men are complex. Think of your relationship not as a straight line but as a series of layers, each revealing a deeper connection. This is not the process of smashing through his walls. It’s a process of winding through the labyrinth.

Cheering up an Aquarius man can be quite challenging because he is an independent man who can be difficult to read.

Do not confront him or force him to open up; just be there for him and let him know you’re there to support him. Show genuine concern. Ask him how he is feeling, and listen to his response.

Engage in activities together. Aquarius men are very sociable, so you could arrange hanging out with your friends or going to a nice restaurant.

Don’t try to role-model emotional expression by showing him a dramatic outpouring of feelings. He’ll only be scared away. He doesn’t know how to handle your feelings because they will remind him of his own. I know that’s the goal, but take small steps.

FAQ on Aquarius Man’s Emotions

Are you struggling to figure out what to do about your Aquarius man and how this will affect your relationship?

Well, luckily for you I have compiled a list of questions that might come up in your relationship. Hopefully, this can help you navigate the difficult times you might experience with your Aquarius man.

Why Is It Hard For Aquarius To Open Up? 

Aquarius man has complexity, and it is very hard to discover whatever is buried beneath the surface. He cherishes his independence and may fear opening up because of his fear of being exposed and vulnerable.

Of course, there is always caution when trusting others after being hurt in the past. Aquarius men tend to be analytical, so opening up is very challenging for them. He may be more open to discussing ideas than his personal feelings.

How Do Aquarius Men Express Their Feelings?

Aquarius men don’t wear their hearts on their sleeves. They keep it on a twelve-foot leash. Although they do not verbally express their feelings easily, they will do generous things for the people they care about.

Aquarius men use action rather than words. Their love and affection are shown through their gestures and acts of kindness.

Learn more about a specific Aquarius man’s love language here <<

Why Are Aquarius Emotionally Distant?

As mentioned earlier, an Aquarius man has a strong need for independence, which makes him emotionally distant. He is intelligent and able to communicate clearly about his ideas, but he is not keen on discussing his emotions.

An Aquarius man has a unique personality, but these traits make him emotionally detached with strong defense mechanisms. His mindset is logical. He prefers to process his emotions internally.

What Does It Mean When An Aquarius Man Opens Up To You?

Your Aquarius man won’t get too close at first. He’s notorious for disappearing acts every time he starts to feel too attached. Ok, honestly, every time he starts to feel the period, emotions aren’t his language.

In case your Aquarius man opens up to you, consider this a significant moment. It is a sign that he trusts you and is not afraid to share his innermost thoughts and feelings with you.

This all leads to deeper emotional connections. You can be sure that he’s worth it and that this is just the beginning of an exciting romance that will challenge everything you thought you knew about love.

Make An Aquarius Man’s Heart Yours…

You are probably wondering how to make an Aquarius feel better. Let him know the validity of his feelings.

It is OK to feel the way he feels, it is completely justified. 

Be a fearless leader who shows her Aquarius lover the way, and you’ll have a worshiper for life. Be his guiding light and help him move through the world with grace and love.

Don’t be afraid to take the plunge and build this beautiful life together.

The two of you can do anything because you are together. Enjoy your time with your Aquarius man! This is a relationship meant for the record books!

But it is up to you to make it happen…

If you truly want to make a breakthrough and make this relationship a success, then you are going to have to work for it…

Learn more on how to soften your Aquarius man and to get him to want a relationship with you <<

Don’t be disheartened if he doesn’t commit or show his feelings right away.

Aquarius men need to be sure they’re not being played. They need to be completely sure about the woman they are committing to because for an Aquarius man, any relationship is for life and he needs to know 100% that you are in it with him.

Show him that you are serious, but just be patient because this may take a while.

Wishing you all the luck of the Universe.

Your friend and Relationship Astrologer,

Anna Kovach

About Author

Hi, this is Anna Kovach. I am a professional Relationship Astrologer and author of dozens of bestselling books and programs. For over a decade I’ve been advising commitment-seeking women like you and helping them understand, attract and keep the man of their dreams using the astonishing power of astrology. Join over 250K subscribers on my newsletter or follow me on social media! Learn more about me and how I can help you here.

9 thoughts on “How To Get An Aquarius Man To Open Up Emotionally (6 Ways)

  1. My Aquarius guy and I met about 2 months ago, we “hit if off” (putting it mildly) from d at y 1, it’s as if we’ve been best friends forever; talking about everything from A -Z and then some.He has shared things with me he says he’s never shared With anyone ever before. Needless to say, I fell fast and hard g or him. Then out of nowhere, he stopped calling and texting, after a couple of days I called him and asked why he was avoiding me. He said that I was so easy to talk to and share things with that it scares him. He called the next day and things picked up right where we left off. A couple of weeks have passed and we’re only texting a little. Why is he going this? HELP!

    1. Hi Shelia!

      He told you that he’s frightened. He is telling you the truth. He got closer to you faster than he wanted to and the idea of how wonderful you are freaks him out. He either thinks that you’re too good to be true or he’s afraid that you’re too good for him and he might mess it up. There are lots of things that run through an Aquarius man’s mind and you should read up more on it. Check out my book “Aquarius Man Secrets” for more useful information.

      1. Ironically you are so on point in all the areas. My Aquarius Man is very unique. As a Leo woman I’m strong headed! Knowledge is very powerful and your descriptions are incredibly valuable.

        1. Hi Jen!

          How wonderful! I am so glad to hear that my articles are providing you with useful insight. I value you as client as well sweetheart. I have to tell you though, this is only scratching the surface. You should check out my books on Aquarius Man Secrets! There is even more information that you may find helpful. I wish you all the best!

  2. We have been best friends for years, told me he wanted to marry me someday , came after me like a spider monkey. Then we got ourselves i to a situationship. Sex is amazing. I feel us getting closer but, he will pull back. Way back. The day I think its over , there he is… And we fall back in.
    He said he could only be friends with benefits , I said I cant. I already love him not , possible. He said it would be ok. He wouldnt hurt me and I still believe him.

    He treats me different now, doesnt text me as much but , always texts me whats going on good. Always tells me what hes gonna be up to but, the way he shared with me has changed.

    Im gonna stop taking his swings personally and give him more space when * can tell its needed. He will tell me he wants me around.

    He is worth all of it but, damn it if it isnt a roller coaster ride like no other

    1. Hi Kristin!

      Ah yes, the Aquarius man often does seem like a roller coaster. You’ve got to set boundaries with him. It’s good you told him no to being friends with benefits. Knowing your worth and letting him know that ensures him being unable to use you for sex. He’s afraid right now of the commitment because he doesn’t want to get hurt. My guess is someone really screwed him over before you and so he’s terrified of getting close to someone even though you are the woman of his dreams. Learn more about him via my book “Aquarius Man Secrets”.

  3. Pisces woman (March 16) here and WOW, did you describe my Capricorn-Aquarius cusp guy (Jan. 20) to a T. We’ve been friends (more like FWB) for almost 4 years and I feel like I’m still getting to know him. He’s smart as hell, funny, charming and full of innuendos. All of my friends adore him and say it’s obvious he likes me, but I constantly question it because he’s so guarded. I realize he shows his feelings instead of telling, but this is foreign to me! One night, out of nowhere, he blurts out that he has trouble expressing his emotions but he’s working on it. He also mentioned that he’s been told before that he can be hot and cold, which is the understatement of the century!
    I had to learn to stop taking his disappearing acts personally, but it’s so hard, especially with my Pisces emotions. He has opened up more than before, but I still feel like I’m talking into a void some days.
    Thank you for the advice above. I will try and exercise more patience with him.

  4. I am associated with an aquarius man for quite some time. At first it was normal but contacts became less and less frequent. Now, it can be months till we talk again and I always initiate the contact. Weird thing is that he told me his feelings are so deep, like the ones he has towards his mother who she loves most in this world. He told me that he considers me his person and trusts me. But sex is non existent and I can tell that he makes concious effort to be as far away from me as possible. It’s so obvious it is almost painful. He also told me that he is not in love with me but that does not mean he does not care. There are times he wants hugs and cuddling and other times he will not even let me touch him. I am contemplating if he is worth fighting for as I still have deep feelings about him. Any ideas?

    1. Dear Deborah,
      It is not worth it!
      With men, it is simple. They are there for you if they want you, and you would know it.  
      Do you feel like you are chasing him? Do you feel like begging him to stay?
      If so, then you need to know your worth. Save space for people who matter.
      Accept what cannot be changed and leave what isn’t for you.
      I hope that soon you will meet the man of your dreams who will be everything you’ve ever asked for!

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *