Hello, lovely! The Aquarius man silent treatment can be puzzling and actually very heartbreaking especially when you find yourself falling for him… The thing you need to remember is that an Aquarius man by nature is quite aloof and detached from their emotions.
Because of this, you might feel the need to ignore your Aquarius man to give him a taste of his own medicine, but this doesn’t always work in the way you may have expected or hoped.
Giving Aquarius man silent treatment can backfire and push him further away. So knowing exactly what to do in this situation is crucial, you don’t want to make the wrong move.
Are you in this situation with your Aquarius man? Then you have absolutely come to the right place! Keep reading to find out exactly how to react when an Aquarius man goes silent. Here are a few steps you can take to handle the situation…
What It Means When An Aquarius Man Goes Silent…
Aquarius men, some of the most confusing and complicated guys out there… They are not very straightforward and their aloof nature can really be frustrating to have to deal with.
Aquarius men can be very hot and cold, in fact, they have mastered this art of the mixed signals! When an Aquarius man goes silent, it can mean a number of things, from needing space and time to think, to feeling overwhelmed by emotions, or even having a change of heart.
These guys are very independent and sometimes it can be quite tough for these men to open up their hearts and express their true feelings. When an Aquarius man goes silent, it might just be a sign that he needs some space or that he is dealing with some issues that he needs to process independently.
An Aquarius man is usually somewhat of a lone wolf and prefers to deal with things on his own before opening up to others. But of course, he may simply also realize that he’s not as interested in you as he initially thought and is trying to distance himself without directly communicating it.
You may also be interested in: When An Aquarius Man Sends Mixed Signals
How To React When An Aquarius Man Goes Silent…
When an Aquarius man goes silent, it will probably make you feel quite insecure and confused. This can be so stressful to deal with, so here are some things you could do to handle this:
Take A Step Back
When an Aquarius man goes silent, it’s important to take a step back and give him the space he needs. He probably needs some time to think and he does this best when he is alone with his own thoughts
If you pressure him or try to ignore him back to give him a taste of his own medicine then you are potentially pushing him away even further which is absolutely no good.
Give him the space he needs and allow him to come to you when he’s ready. No amount of pressure is going to make him open up or communicate if he’s not ready. All you can really do is respect his boundaries and give him the time and space he needs.
Don’t Let It Get To You
Keeping cool, calm, and collected is the best approach to take in this situation. If you get too riled up and let it get to you, it may only exacerbate the situation which is definitely not ideal.
If you can keep your composure and not let his silence affect you too much, it will show him that you are independent and not easily shaken. Show him that you aren’t going to jump to any conclusions or make assumptions based on his silence.
His silence is not necessarily a negative sign or a reflection of the way he feels about you. The best reaction is to be as cool as you can be. Avoid overthinking or obsessing over his silence.
Try And Read Him
While an Aquarius man may be silent, you can still observe him and pay attention to his non-verbal cues. If the two of you have been spending a lot of time together and have built a connection, you may be able to read his body language and energy to get a sense of what he’s thinking or feeling.
He might simply just be enjoying being around you without the need to actually have to say anything. This is actually a great sign as it shows that he feels comfortable in your presence.
When you start to get to know him and understand his behaviour patterns, you may be able to recognize if his silence is a temporary thing or if there might be deeper underlying issues at play.
Have A Conversation
If you’re unsure about his silence and want to address it directly, it’s perfectly okay to have a conversation with him. If you feel like enough time has passed, it might be a good idea to have an open and honest conversation with him to express your feelings and concerns.
When you reach out to him, you may come to understand that there could be factors outside of your relationship that are causing him to go silent. By having a calm and understanding conversation, you can communicate your feelings and give him an opportunity to explain his silence.
He may not even realize how you have been feeling and the impact his silence has had on you. This will probably just make you realize how important communication is in a relationship and how it’s crucial to address any concerns or issues that arise.
Read also: 11 Questions To Ask An Aquarius Man To Spark His Interest
Patience Is Key
Silence can sometimes be really hurtful in a relationship, but it’s important to remember that everyone processes their emotions differently and sometimes the situation might call for patience.
If your Aquarius man continues to give you the silent treatment, then you may have to still put your emotions aside and remember that he probably processes his emotions differently than you do.
If you can be patient and give him the space he needs, it may allow him to come back and open up in his own time. Try and remove the pressure on him by not constantly asking him why he’s silent or pressuring him to talk.
Instead, focus on being supportive and understanding, and let him know that you’re there for him whenever he’s ready to talk and then let him come to you when he is ready.
Does Giving An Aquarius Man The Silent Treatment Work?
Aquarius men might not react in a predictable way when they’re ignored because they’re pretty independent and often do their own thing. Ignoring an Aquarius man might not faze him much, or he might even see it as a welcome break to have some alone time.
But there’s also a chance he could see it as a sign that things are off, so he might back off even more. If he’s into you and just needs a moment to himself, playing the ignoring game could make him wonder why you’re mirroring his behavior, and he might try to reach out to see what’s up.
But all in all, these guys value direct communication, so ignoring them isn’t usually the best strategy if you’re trying to make a point or get their attention.
If you have some misunderstanding with your Aquarius man, you might want to talk to him because this is what happens when you ignore an Aquarius man: he may interpret it as a lack of interest or disengagement, and it could potentially damage the relationship further.
What Happens When You Ignore An Aquarius Man?
If you decide to ignore an Aquarius man, you’re rolling the dice on how he’ll take it. He might just brush it off and enjoy the extra space, since his independence is a big deal to him. If he figures you’re losing interest, he might just accept it and move on, not a fan of drama or chasing someone who seems uninterested.
But, if the guy’s got feelings for you, your silence might get him thinking. He could become curious about the sudden change in your behavior, prompting him to reach out and check in. He’ll want to know if everything’s okay or if he’s missed a beat somewhere.
Still, Aquarians are all about keeping it real. They’re not into games or the whole guessing scene. So if your aim is to get his attention or bring something up, you’re better off being straight-up about it. Open and honest conversation tends to work best with an Aquarius—it’s clear, direct, and no one’s left guessing.
Read also: How To Deal With An Aquarius Man That Is Distancing Himself (11 Ways)
Ignoring An Aquarius Man After A Breakup — Will He Come Back If You Ignore Him?
Like I have mentioned a couple of times, an Aquarius man is somewhat of a strange character. You can always expect the unexpected with these men as they never follow the rules.
Ignoring an Aquarius man after a breakup doesn’t guarantee that he will come back. Due to their independent nature and dislike for emotional games, your Aquarius man may not respond to the silent treatment the way you might hope.
If he’s really into you, there’s a chance he might wonder about the silence and potentially reach out. However, if he’s comfortable with the breakup or values his independence over the relationship, he might just move on.
Aquarians generally respect direct communication, so if your goal is to rekindle things, a straightforward conversation is usually more effective than ignoring him. He isn’t someone you are going to get a reaction from easily as he never really shows his cards easily or plays mind games.
Doing the no-contact rule with him isn’t guaranteed to make him come back, as an Aquarius man values his independence and might even feel relieved that he no longer has to deal with you. I know this might be harsh to hear, but it’s important to understand that Aquarius men prioritize their freedom and personal.
Read next: Does Walking Away From An Aquarius Man Actually Get Him Back?
No More Sleepless Nights About Your Aquarius Man…
It can be SO painful to worry about how to make things work with an Aquarius man who won’t commit. I know. I’ve been there with many of my friends dating Aquarius guys.
I remember my very close friend crying herself to sleep at night, worried that her man would never commit to her. She lost sleep, time, and even work hours, all because she couldn’t figure out how to capture his heart and get him to commit.
As a friend, it was hard to watch her go through that.
But I knew how good he was for her, and I didn’t want her to give up on him. Even when our other friends were telling her to move on, I could see that he was the most incredible man she had ever met.
How could she just give up on that?
But it wasn’t easy. It took a LOT of work.
She had to learn how to speak a different language… his love language!
And it worked!!
So if you are ready to sleep like a baby knowing your Aquarius man is MADLY in love with you…
And never feel anxious about him again…
Click here now and learn to speak your Aquarius man’s love language.
Sending you love,
Your sister and relationship astrologer,
Anna Kovach
To whom it may concern.
I started talking to an Aquarius man that i met over social media. Now we have beein talking on and off for 9 months now and the last 2months it started getting more serious now we haven’t met yet but he started giving me the silent treatment and some times his just ignoring me flat. Now i have talked to him about it and even asked him if he wants me to move on with my life and he just ends up asking, if i want to give up on us is that what i want? Well hello noo it’s not what i want heheh but the last two weeks it just got wors and again i asked him to tell me what’s going on and said to him if he wants me to move on with my life he must just tell me I answerd his question also before hand lol and said noo i don’t and that I love him, he then replied by saying I love you soo fucking much and sorry things are just hectic at work. Now its just getting even wors soo what would you advise me to do if possible please help me I’m also divorced and he is lot younger than me but i did tell him I do understand that he needs his own time and still has a lot of girl friends and i do trust him after he asked me if i do soo please please help me….
Kind regards
Suzan
Tell him you want to be friends if you want to stop the mind games. They want to see what makes you tick. I loathe tests so I’m out. I gave mine the silent treatment. Waiting for him to call for me to end it. And ours was still new but his attitude is disgusting.
Hey, I’m 16…I know I’m a little young but my aqarius boyfriend and I have been dating for almost 3 months now and he’s doing the exact same thing! He ignores me from time to time and when I comment on his posts on Instagram he just likes the comments!! Even a regular person who isn’t dating me would respond with “thanks” or anything like that! Sometimes I feel like he’s ashamed to let the world know we date. And most of the time when I call him he doesn’t answer and texts me “talk later babe” or sends me a paragraph about how stressful his week has been and how he’s overwhelmed with school. And yes I do understand that, but everyday ?. I swear if I got one more text like that I’ll go crazy! I love him with all of my heart but I’m not getting the attention I need, and when I finally do talk to him our time is limited because he’s always falling asleep… am I that boring? And I wouldn’t know since the only thing he does is call me cute.. and when I’m talking he doesn’t pay attention because he too busy “getting lost in my eyes”? and EVERYTHING I DO IS CUTE APPARENTLY. But when I talk to him I feel comfortable like getting something I’ve alwasy wanted, or even talking to a celebrity or walking around light as air. But lately I’ve been feeling so empty and bored Idk I just feel like he isn’t interested anymore, and that this relationship is one sided. I used to get “Goodmorning” texts and even “goodnight” texts now I rarely hear from him.. but he has all the time in the world to be on Snapchat and watch his story just to see what he’s up to because I miss him like crazy. And stalk his Instagram just to see pictures of the man I love. And it’s already hard because he lives two hours away!Also I saw this one picture on instgram where he was groping another girls butt, but not actually touching it… idk if that makes sense. But it really pissed me off but I thought I shouldn’t say anything because I don’t want him to feel trapped and like he can’t have friends and be free to be himself. I just want him to stop being so “busy”… because my Mother said “if he really loves you he’ll make time for you”. So if u go based off how much attention I’m getting he doesn’t love me at all. And I really don’t want that to be true.
Hi we are in the same boat.My Aqua is just alike your aqua.I tell u , IGNORE HIM.DO NOT TEXT BACK and do your silent treatment like how he did to U. I swear , he crazy on me everyday now. Reply him just in border line do not show too much interest.
So I’ve been talking to this Aquarius dude for sometime now and we’re not dating or anything but it was so odd how we’ve been talking basically non stop and randomly out of nowhere he stops texting me or even Bothering to open any of messages but yet he still views my story’s on social media?????? I’m left confused and not knowing what I did wrong. I need help please
Hey!
I’ve been online friends with an Aqua guy for a long time on and off, after not speaking for years we got really close over a couple months, and finally we decided to meet. Had a great couple days and once returned we became even closer friends. We flirt but we’re super open and almost best friends, talk on the phone for hours, everyday we talk at least once on the phone and text throughout. He’s done the disappearing thing where he says he cuts off from everyone, usually a couple days. It’s been a week now. I’ve sent countless texts expressing my worries and wondering where he is. He’s still viewing my social media but that’s it. It’s given me the worst anxiety and everyone is saying to move on and leave it. I don’t know what to do 🙁
Hey!I m 18 years old & my boyfriend is 23 we met on Instagram and in a relationship from
8 months he says he love me but he gives me silent treatment from time to time he didn’t talk to me 4 months then texted me why u texting me? I answered I want to know he said if u be my friend nothing else I will be a single text away .I said block me but he said no we can talk from time to time.after few days I tell him I love u and sorry I will never ask u for commitment and asked him do u love me ? He said offcourse that’s y I m in contact with you otherwise I don’t like to talk with everyone .after this everything will become fine he started talking to me like lovers talk but with a gap of 3 to 4 days whenever I texted him missing u he answered me I s busy and talk to me
Now from almost 1 month he is again not talking to me I can’t understand why he is doing this?he loves me or not ?y he didn’t make commitment?
Hi Anna! Thanks for sharing your Aquarius guy situation. Your guy sounds like he’s a bit of a mess honey. He sounds confused and like he needs to figure his own life out before he tries to romance someone. If he didn’t make a clear commitment to you then you may not get what you want from him because as he sees it, he doesn’t have any strings attached to you. There are many things that you may want to learn about the Aquarius guy before you make any decisions. Check out my book here as it may help you.
Hi
I am 21 and I met my aquarius (23 y.o.) boyfriend online a few months ago … After some months we spent getting to know each other online( video calls etc) , we finally had the chance to meet and spend time together for some days where we realised how much we enjoy being together… Because he lives in a different country, i had to go back to my country so we decided to keep this relationship even though it’s difficult to pull off. He has told me many times , before we even meet from upclose, that he gets sad when we spend time together through the distance ( like video calling) and that it makes him want me even more to be around him. The problem is that after i got back he has become really distant, even though he is not cold or something like that when we text or talk, he has stopped calling me on the phone and avoids to spend time with me.It’s been 2 months that we are apart again and even though he hasn’t changed the way he talks to me, he is really avoiding to talk to me, he just never calls , he only texts and takes hours to reply..Of course i asked him why he does that and he just says that there is nothing wrong, its just that he doesnt enjoy spending time with me over the distance and that if i would be around he would be with me all the time… even though i can see his point of view i really feel that he doesnt care about how i feel and how much i need more communication even though he knows and he admits that he knows that i need it…
Hi there! It sounds like your Aquarius guy isn’t really sure if a long distance relatoinship is the right thing for him. Many of them are good with it but after a period of time passes, they decide they really do need the physical connection also. This may make him think things over and try to figure out what he truly wants and this makes him pull back thus becoming cold and not responsive. If you’d like to know more about the Aquarius man and what to do, please check out my book here.
hi anna
i have aquarius boyfriend i am an aries girl i know it sounds a bit harsh but i used to tell him i dont want to see and be with him anymore sometimes i feel guilty though because were 4 years.he really gets upset and always chased me…if i started acting this way he gets crazy …which i am just honest and true to myself i find him selfish and attention seeker..i want to get him out of my life what i must do..he never stops and get me chase all the time..
Hi Margarita!
You need to put your foot down and not let him come back. Change your number, block him on social media, and eliminate him from your life entirely. If he cannot get in contact with you then he will finally give up. You can cut the cord you two share. You have to be vigilant though. No backsliding or he’ll come right back in.
Been with my aqua for 5 months. I’m Scorpio woman. We have known each other over 20 years and friends. I got a call from some woman that I didn’t know saying he was meeting her for hookup. We had never had cross words before this. I lost my temper and called and texted him about it and broke up before giving him the benefit of the doubt because I had no concrete facts of the situation . We were planning to marry this year. It’s been almost 2 weeks of silence and rejecting my phone calls. Is there any hope to save this relationship?
Hi Mysti! Thank you for writing in about your complicated situation. Aquarius men harden their hearts when they are angry or hurt. He’s probably trying to process why this happened and why you’d fly off the handle at him without talking to him. All you can really do is give it some more time, keep periodically sending him an apologetic text asking him to talk to you face to face. If he does respond and agrees to meet up, give him a heartfelt apology. Not for what you accused him of because you still don’t know what that was about but more for accusing him without talking to him first. Tell him you should have talked to him or asked him before getting upset. As a Scorpio woman, you reacted to your emotions and what you felt. Sadly, this wounded or angered your Aquarius. So again, time, patience, and apologies. If you’d like to know more about the Aquarius man as it may help you, check out my book “Aquarius Man Secrets”.
Hello,
I have been seeing my Aqua man for 6 months now. Just recently the beginning of July he stopped talking to me out of no where. Before hand we would talk almost every day and we would see each other every weekend. The last time I was with him he invited me over to his home for the first time. We enjoyed each others company and everything went well. A couple days after that we spoke and he explained to me that he was stressed out do to work. Since then I have not heard from him. Ive called and text but yet I have not received anything. I read online that Aqua people do enjoy their space and need time to think & I think for a month now I should have at least communicated with him but still nothing.
What do you think I should do?
Hi Tori!
It’s true that Aquarius men love their space but how much space are we talking about? Days? Weeks? Months? There is such a thing as too much space which leads to a relationship end. Why don’t you check on him and see how he’s doing. Send him a simple text saying you’re thinking of him and wondering how he’s doing. He should answer you but if he doesn’t then you may need to prepare for him to be trying to end things. Keep your head up!
Me and my aquarius man.Had a argument due to him not communicating.Which I talk to him about over and over.He uses wifi to contact me.However if he’s not near wifi he cannot call.But his brother has a phone.Im like u could’ve called me from your brother phone.I treated him well was there when his family wasn’t.Now hes saying I never want him to do nothing.I always want him around me all the time.I had a problem with him going outta town with his sister.And tht was because neither one of them had a liscense.And he was the driver.Also hes only off work on fridays.When we both wake up.We chill for 3 hours then hes bck at work.Then it’s days tht I always had to remind him to call me or he’ll take hours responding to my text messages.Hes been very mean lately.And since our argument he’s been gone for a week.Hasnt called me or anything.I also recently found out he’s been in another relationship for two years.Im like how he was over here day & night.She says they haven’t been sexually active or anything.But it’s just the point he lied about not having another woman.So we were into about tht to.But I was wondering if they been together 2 years.Why haven’t they been intimate.Found text messages with him calling her wife.Jus like he call me.He got rid of the phone to make me secure about the situation.But yet she says he was still calling her.Should I jus say fuck him completely.Cause Im considering it.People are telling me to give him time away.Eventually he’ll come around and explain himself.What should I do???
Hi Queeny!
Wait so he’s giving you distance and tells you that he had another girl? They didn’t have sex? That doesn’t sound right to me. I think you need to trust your intuition. These are red flags that cannot be ignored sweetheart. He doesn’t sound as into you as you are to him. Blow him off and if he tries to reach out tell him that you have needs and if he cannot meet them then it’s not going to work. He’ll either step up or he’ll move on. Do what is best for YOU.
Hi i’m a libra, i have been seeing my aqua man since 7 months now, a month ago his behaviour suddenly changed he stopped initiating conversations like he usually did and I did tell him numerous times that it’s bothering me and upon insisting he told me that he’s stress and probably has depression and needs to see a therapist and that I’m the only person he has told about his depression i got worried and I offered to book his appointment with the shrink but he said he’ll manage, i thanked him for trusting me and telling me about his depression I wanted to meet him but whenever I asked him he said we’ll meet soon, after sometime he literally stopped talking to me and i don’t know what got into I blocked him on WhatsApp where we usually chat in hopes that he would contact me on some other platform but he didn’t, i wanted to text him on his birthday which I did but at 11:30pm when his birthday almost got over, he didn’t respond, next day I apologized for disappearing on him and gave my reasons but he still isn’t replying I don’t want to lose him, would really appreciate your advice
Hi Nita!
If your Aquarius guy is depressed and in need of therapy then there is much you can do. He has to want to get the help and then actually do it otherwise he’s not going to get better and not able to maintain any sort of relationship with anyone. He has to be good with himself in order to be good with anyone else. He isn’t right now and is showing you that he cannot do it. Give him time and space to figure himself out. You can send a text once a week just to say hi and wish him well but I wouldn’t try to do much more than that or he’ll think you’re pressuring him which will lead to him never speaking to you again. Be careful and always do what is right for you sweetheart! You deserve the best.
Okay hello! So I’m a Libra woman my crush is an Aquarius of course. It all started with him asking my friend about me always and he wanted to talk to me so when I finally agreed everything went amazing! He was nice to talk to and always informed me and apologized when he was busy he even would FaceTime me because he wanted to see me but then slowly it started getting confusing we would see each other throughout the week and weekend maybe twice a week if not once he would even ask if I was going to my friends outings so he could be there too and I took it as ok he wants to see me and sometimes I would sense that I maybe make him nervous? Because of how he would act like he wouldn’t talk directly toward me but some of the things he would talk about would be at me but he would say it loud enough for me to hear? Maybe It was just me thinking that I have no idea but anyway he comes from a marriage and before some things happened with the marriage where the wife cheated. On this particular day he made a status saying how can I trust you if my own blood brother turned against me? And after that he wouldn’t answer my calls or texts. I seen him the last night I tried calling and at first he only said hey and went on with his business and then when he was leaving he gave me a hug and that was it. I haven’t done anything wrong I only talked to him but he’s been on social media ever since then. What did I do? It was going great we even planned several dates and I don’t get asked out often so this would be my first real relationship encounter if we had even made it that far. Please tell me it’s not over!
Hi Asia!
Alright so, Aquarius men tend to tell you the truth if you ask them a question. That being said, you need to ask him what you did wrong. Tell him you have no idea what you did wrong and you cannot fix or change things if you have no idea. He should tell you what is up and what he needs or wants. Don’t be afraid to be honest and ask for honesty from him. Knowing is half the battle but at least you’d have an answer from him.
Hello Anna,
I have developed a unique relationship and a special bond with an Aquarius over the past couple of years. Me being a Scorpio. We used to be colleagues before he changed his job in September 2019. We have kept in contact on a regular basis. And meet on occasion. Sometimes with the whole old team. Sometimes just the two of us. With time I have developed romantic feelings for him. The only problem is that he’s already in a relationship. With whom he has two younger kids. So I send him a text saying I have feelings that are not suitable, and therefore I should leave him alone. Which also breaks my heart, because I considered him a close and dear friend. It has now been three weeks, and I haven’t heard anything from him since I told him. And I feel like I’m in a mental prison not being able to have closure. And this being our/my last words. Because my heart and logic are not really agreeing on what I really want in this situation. What should I do?
Hi Sad Scorpio,
You did the right thing by telling him that it’s not suitable for you two to be starting anything while he’s already in a relationship. That will only cause problems for everyone involved and you don’t deserve to be anyone’s second choice. What closure do you need honey? You told him it’s not suitable therefore it’s an “end”. You’re going to have to resolve this feeling inside yourself in order to free yourself. You know it’s not right to continue being with someone who has someone else. He has to end it with her and be free in order to be with you totally. Unless that happens, you need to do what is best for you. Trust your intuition sweetheart and do what your inner soul tells you is the right thing. I wish you all the best!
So he has been my school crush in 2004 and it was 2years back that I started talking to him .. he is in a relationship since 8yrs. He does know how I feel for him , I took my chances n confessed everything, 6 months back he did tell me that he loves me as well , this week he says he feels guilty on the whole thing but he wants me n his gf both the same time he doesnt want to give up on me, he gives me every detail of his day like what he cooked for lunch, dinner etc etc … but he keeps giving me silent treatment and I respect totally and after some gaps when I get back to him it is like I am his everything. . So I don’t understand what’s really up his end . And what does he want from he just sounds confused ..
Hi XyZ!
It sounds like he’s not going to give up his girlfriend. He wants to have you both. He said that part already on his own. Are you alright being his side chic? That’s all you’ll ever be unless he actually decides that you’re more important than she is. Until that happens, he’s going to bounce back and forth because he can. Don’t let him do that to you. Stand up and tell him either “her or me, not both”. You might want to check out my book “Aquarius Man Secrets” for more information.
Hi Anna
I am a Taurus woman with a Aquarius man we have been together for one year now, he ignores me over silly arguments every other month. Last month I caught him looking at a woman and confronted him because it hurt my feelings, he blamed me straight away, he then blocked me two days later even though I didn’t make contact at all.
Highly confused because I don’t understand the silence. He feels very deeply for me but he is not consistent which worries me.
How do I deal with the situation once he does decide to message me?
And how do I tell him that it concerns me that he is not consistent in terms of putting in effort towards the relationship? I feel I am the only that cares about our relationship.
Thank you
Hi Nish!
Aquarius men are flirts. If you are worried because he’s looking at another woman, you’re probably feeling insecure about his desire for you. Many people “look” at other people because it’s a fun variety but it doesn’t mean he wants her more than you or that he’s going to leave you for someone else, etc. If you’ve ever given him other jealousy tendencies then this is turning him off big time. Aquarius men don’t like jealous women. He’s probably trying to think about whether this is working for him or not. Reach out to him tell him you’d like have a real sit down talk. Don’t be emotional when you do. Be logical. You might want to check out my book “Aquarius Man Secrets” for more information.
I am a Libra and I was talking to my Aquarius man for 6 months straight. I am the texter and he is the phone caller. He would call me on the way to work, on the way to lunch, on the way back from lunch, on the way home and then we would talk on the phone for hours once he made it home. He would even call me when he left the house to get something to eat if he wasn’t cooking at home. We would be on the phone cooking with one another and swapping recipe ideas. He eventually shared his dreams with me in regards to his business ventures. He is a very private person and “Only a Select Few Know” what he has going on. He has shared his dreams, hobbies and a lot of personal things about himself. In return I have been 100% an open book with him.
We have been friends for over 20 years. And we did have an entanglement at one time. I moved out of town and just came back after being gone for the last 15 years. I am married and came back to my hometown to get closer to my family to get a divorce. He knows I am married. It’s no secret.
We started talking when he jumped in my DM one day flirting with me. Then he started calling me all the time, everyday. It went from him just flirting with me to us really getting closer than we were back in the day. I’m not going to lie we were initially talking about hooking up. Yes, I am married, but in a very volatile marriage. I haven’t been sexually active with my husband in over a year. So when he started flirting, I liked the attention. However, somewhere along the line it changed for him and eventually it changed for me. I thought WE caught feelings. He no longer wanted to just hook-up. Although we talked on the phone ALL the time, we did not spend physical time together after the first couple of months when he would come see me at my Dad’s house and for a few hours.
DISCLAIMER: He knows my WHOLE family because he is my brother-in-law’s 1st cousin. He has only met my husband one time. And I knew him before I knew my husband.
Any way after he caught feelings, he no longer wanted to come around me physically because he said he wouldn’t want anyone to do that to him if he was married. He never really said the words, “I want to be with you after you get a divorce.” However, when he would talk about the future he talked about it with me in it. When I asked him, “What are we doing?” He would say, “Nothing right now until your situation changes.” However, he would still call me EVERY SINGLE DAY whenever he was free. I would text him and instead of him texting me back he would pick up the phone and call. We have even spoken about marriage.
PROBLEM: He called me one morning on the way to work, I told him I would call him at lunch, since he is the one always calling. I called him and he didn’t answer. No big deal. I called him about an hour later because I know he doesn’t have to be back at work for 3 hours. Still no answer. I texted him because he asked me to do something for him that pertains to one of his businesses. He texted me right back that he got some bad news earlier that day and he wouldn’t be able to take care of what he asked me to do. The first thing I told him is, “Don’t shut me out.” And that’s exactly what he did. He texted me that he would tell me everything later, but he totally went SILENT on me. I was SHOCKED at the fact that he didn’t think he owed me any type of explanation after talking to me everyday on the phone. I told him not to shut down on me because he had gotten mad at me before and stopped talking to me for a week. I told him that lack of communication is a Deal Breaker for me. I dealt with that in my marriage I wouldn’t deal with it in my next relationship. And BAM here he does it again.
A week later, I find out the bad news is that his sister was given 3 months to live from cancer. She is like a 2nd Mom to him. He already lost his mother to cancer and here he is about to go through it again with his sister. I understand that everyone grieves differently and this is a very sensitive situation. But it was unfair how he completely shut me out.
I don’t call him, but I called him a couple of times. NO ANSWER. I texted him to let him know I was concerned and thinking about him. NO ANSWER.
I eventually got him to call me and when I tried to ask him what was going on with us what am I supposed to do because he went silent on me he kinda got upset and basically told me, “I’m going to say this and I am going to jump off the phone. This is how I deal with this stuff. I did the same thing when my Mom passed. There is nothing that anyone can do about it. I know it’s not fair, but this is how I deal.” The only thing I could say was, “OK.” but I was HURT!!!
It’s been almost 1.5 mlonths now. I’ve went from concerned, to confused, to hurt, to angry. So much so that I’ve sent some crazy texts.
When I finally got fed up, I sent one to purposely poke the bear because I just wanted some type of reaction. I got it….LOL….He was upset and told me that he feels the best thing to do is for us to “Leave everything alone.” because I don’t seem to understand that he is dealing with his sister dying at any moment and all he is getting from me is, “What about me?”
I reached out to him a couple of weeks after that text to ask him if he was referring to our friendship also. He said, “No. We’re good. That situation just HAS me upset.” The situation being my last text. He misinterpreted something that I texted. I apologized via text and a voice message. But I still can’t get him to talk to me besides a very informal text here and there.
I’m at my wits end. I was 100% invested in this relationship. Again, yes I am married. However, we are more like roommates at this point. We live in the same house, but we live in separate rooms. I am still here because I am finishing up school and we have 2 small kids. I can’t just pack up and leave because he has taken all the money away from me because I have been a stay-at-home mom while I finish school.
I wish I had read your blogs and newsletter prior to me blowing him up. I feel rejected. I didn’t realize that someone could just ignore you like this when they are in some type of relationship with you just because they can. I think it’s rude, immature and irresponsible.
I guess I’m writing because I don’t know whether to move on or stay the course and wait for him to come around. I know he’s going to come back around. I feel that in my soul. I just don’t know how to react when he does. If the situation wasn’t what it was, I would have told him to kick rocks by now. However, too many people told me this is the way that he deals. However, those people aren’t in the same type of relationship that we are in.
Yes, Yes, Yes, Yes, I know. “Janey, you are married. Why are you even worried about another man? Work on your damn marriage.” I worked on it for over 13 years. I’m over it. I worked hard. But, I can’t fix someone that doesn’t think they are broke. Hurt people, hurt people and I got tired being hurt mentally, financially, emotionally, sexually and some times physically by my husband.
I deserve better and better came in the form of this Aquarius man that I’ve always had a connection with.
Advice?
At this point, I’m about over it. In the beginning I told him I would be here for him, but hell I didn’t think I wouldn’t hear from him at all. I am wondering if he is waiting on his sister to die before he reaches back out to me. I see him on social media so I know he is still running his businesses. He still reaches out to me concerning the business when he needs to. All I asked him to do is to call me one time just so I can hear his voice because I miss him. NOTHING.
Hi Janey!
You are right. It takes two to make it or break it. If he cannot even give you a simple phone call then that speaks volumes after everything you’ve been through already honey. You need to work on taking care of YOU for a change and not worry about anyone else. When you get yourself where you want to be, the right love will emerge and be there for you. I hope you don’t write Aquarius men off due to this one guy. I wish you all the best.